


The Universe Doesn't Care

by kayethespade



Series: Kiari Ryder [5]
Category: Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: Cuddling, F/M, Feelings, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Child Neglect, Minor Angst, Nonbinary Character, Pre-Relationship, everyone thinks they hooked up, nb ryder is custom, not true
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-03
Updated: 2017-05-07
Packaged: 2018-10-27 19:56:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10815657
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kayethespade/pseuds/kayethespade
Summary: Kiari needs a hug, but her crew barely talks to her. She goes to the resident ray of sunshine for help.





	1. Understatement

"SAM?" Kiari muttered.

"Yes, Pathfinder?"

"This week fucking sucks."

That was putting it lightly. Scott was in a coma. Alec was dead and had left her with a nigh impossible job description which was, in essence, to be him. The crew and the Nexus leadership and the settlers and everyone wanted her father instead of her. Her new and exciting Angaran squadmate wouldn't talk to her, and now she had to convince Efvra that her species wouldn't blow up what was left of his species.

Just. Peachy.

"Would you like a tactical assessment, or should I contact Dr. Lexi for a sleep aid?" SAM asked.

"Dad asked for tactical assessments to lull him to sleep?" It sounded just like him, with that pole up his ass about everything.

"Yes. He was rather fond of them."

Kiari grinned to herself for a moment. She hated him with every fibre of her being, but hearing that he'd dealt with insomnia gave her a goal: get through it better than him. "I don't think this is something sleeping pills or strategy can solve, SAM."

"What do you think you require?"

"Someone to talk to would be a good start," she said.

"You are currently talking to me," he suggested. Kiari groaned from the obviousness of that fact, flipping over onto her stomach.

"Someone human, preferably. Or not. Just somebody else," Kiari sighed.

"I detect that Mr. Kosta is still awake," SAM informed. Kiari though he sounded a little offended but quickly dismissed it.

She decided that she needed someone as optimistic and hopeful as she'd been a few days ago. Kiari stood up and debated putting on a bra or something for all of two seconds.

"Heh. He's not that special," she mumbled with a persistent smile.

Being careful not to wake anyone else, Kiari tiptoed down to Liam's space. She wasn't sure how to approach it. The premise was already awkward. What exactly did she plan to say? 'Hey I can't sleep and I'm spiraling into self-doubt. Mind if I crash here for a bit?'

Kiari didn't get the chance to think further on this because the door opened to reveal Mr. Tall, Dark, and Handsome himself. She mentally berated herself for that description then realized that they were both just standing there in silence. She should have realized that this would be weird after she flirted with him over that beer and then totally confirmed her interest in the most awkard way possible.

"You need something, Pathfinder?" he asked, leaning against his doorframe.

"Sorry for coming by so late. I'm stressed about everything and need a friend," Kiari replied. She sounded a lot smoother than she felt.

Liam stood to the side to let her in. There was something sweet about the smile that came to his face. "Not a problem, but why me?"

"Logically? Everyone else is asleep. Off the record, you seem like the safest person to talk to right now." She didn't know how her face stayed neutral for all that.

"Well, I'm honoured," he said. "What do you wanna talk about?"

"To start: this whole thing is totally fubar right now," she muttered. His head tilted in confusion. "Fucked up beyond all recognition. Sorry."

"No problem. You've got a lot to worry about right now. Feel free to just talk." Liam sat beside her.

"Alright. Everyone still wants my father more than me right now. It isn't exactly a nice feeling. Especially when I still have to do his job and command his ship. And I still have no idea why he chose me. He had his second all trained up and ready to go if something happened to him. He could have left me on Habitat 7, and everything would be going fine. Everyone already trusted him. The bastard at least knew what he was doing with all this," Kiari ranted.

"Back up a second. He was not going to leave you. You're his kid." She could have melted from the warm concern etched into his face.

"I wasn't the one he cared about, Liam. He absolutely loved Scott. He just went along with whatever Dad wanted. I didn't...couldn't. I was Mom's favorite, and she's dead," she grumbled.

"You already have one outpost on Eos, Ryder, and from what I've seen, the trend will keep going. From what Cora's told me, you've got a few things on your old man," Liam reasoned.

"You've hardly known me a week," Kiari chuckled. She looked over at Liam with a tired smile. He'd leaned forwards with his elbows on his knees.

"You've hardly known me a week, and yet you decided I'm the trustworthy one," he teased.

"Fair point. You mind if I stay here for a while? The Pathfinder quarters don't feel like they're mine yet."

"Sure!" Liam vaulted over the couch towards a set of cabinets. He grabbed a few extra blankets and a pillow, throwing them over to her. She smiled up at him and rearranged herself on the couch.

"Wait. Where are you going to sleep?" Kiari asked. She pushed herself up on one elbow. Liam had started laying himself down with another blanket and pillow on the floor. "No way! I'm not letting you sleep on the floor for me again."

"How did you know that-"

"Cora told me you wouldn't leave me to wake up alone in SAM Node. Kind of adorable, really. Here, it'll probably be wide enough if we take out the cushions for tonight," she suggested. Kiari threw the back cushions onto the floor by one of the armrests. With that accomplished, she scooted in closer to the back of the couch and pat the edge beside her. "Oh! Are you cool with sleeping on the same couch?"

"Well, since you're offering," Liam teased. "I'll warn you, though, I'm a cuddler."

"Not to sound too forward, but please do."

His lips quirked up into a smirk. "Coming onto me, Ryder?"

She made grabby hands towards him with a frustrated huff. "Get over here before I make you."

"You'd use biotics for a hug?" Liam pushed himself up onto the couch next to her. His arm laid casually over her waist.

"I can neither confirm nor deny that." Kiari nestled into his chest and drew one leg over his hips.

"You would. You totally would."

She felt around lightly for his bicep and smacked a little harder than intended. She rubbed gently at his gasp. "Sorry."

"You say that a lot."

...

"Sorry," Kiari giggled. She could feel him smiling above her from the way his jaw shifted.

"It's okay. It's all going to work out eventually." His hand rubbed at her back.

"Thanks. I needed this. Let's-" The sentence broke off in a wide yawn. "Let's hope it works out for the best."


	2. Doctor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kiari isn't nearly as subtle as she pretends to be.

"Pathfinder, do you mind if I ask you something?" Lexi asked as Kiari passed on the way back to her quarters the next morning. Morning didn't exactly exist in space, but the ship was an hour out from Havarl. For all intents and purposes, it was morning.

Kiari nodded fervently and stepped into the medbay. The door swooshed shut behind her. She tried not to bounce on her toes from nervous energy. Waking up next to someone hadn't happened to her in a long time.

"Let me know if I'm overstepping my boundaries, but are you and Liam intimate?"

By some holy miracle, Kiari kept a straight face. "You are a doctor. For you, you're not overstepping. As for your question, no. For now."

"Ah. I saw that you spent the night in his quarters, and I just assumed...alright, thank you," Lexi replied. She nearly would have returned to her reports. "Wait. You said not yet."

"Off the record, I have no idea where this is going. Tentatively, I'm going to say friends edging towards infatuation, but I can't be certain if it's mutual."

"Are you always this clinical when talking about off-the-job activities?" she teased. Kiari sighed, placing a hand to her forehead.

"It's a defense mechanism to keep from blushing like a teenager. Besides: I'm always on the job," Kiari corrected. She felt a nervous grin splitting her lips.

"For what it's worth, I hope it goes well," Lexi said.

"Please stop," she giggled into her hand.

"You deserve to be happy, Kiari. Frankly, I think you should go for him if he's who you want. You're so young, and you have so much ahead of you, not all of it good. So long as you're safe about it, and you can come to me for that, take whatever happiness you can. You've earned it."

"We'll see how things go. If it looks like it may turn a certain way, you'll be the first to know. Anyways, I've gotta be armored up in fifty-five minutes. See you on the other side," Kiari joked.

"Try to stay in one piece!" Lexi called after her as she ran back towards her quarters.


	3. Havarl

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's much time to chat between the enemy encounters on Havarl. This time, the topic is Kiari's relationship status.

Kiari yelled in victory as the adhi succumbed to her omniblade. She took a few deep breaths as the clicks and chirps of Havarl became the only sounds once again. She grinned to herself with her hands on her knees. Vetra came to her side with a gentle hand on her back.

"You okay?"

"Well that was fucking insane." Kiari coughed for a few moments before straightening up and cracking her back. "I'm good."

Jaal's head swivelled in her direction. "What was that?"

"Human joints pop from lactic acid sometimes. No big deal," she answered. "Anyways, am I the only one who thinks the adhi are adorable?"

"Ryder, what the fuck?" Vetra struggled while she laughed.

"I'm serious! They're like viscious lizard puppies."

"Emphasis on viscious," Jaal muttered. "Also: what is a 'puppy'?"

“Young, domesticated wolves, which are like adhi except soft. You can't tell me someone hasn't at least tried to domesticate adhi." She crossed her arms over her chest.

"Well, yes, but they are mostly used as attack or hunting animals."

"Ah right. Same with wolves for a while, but...right. No time for pets. Nevermind for now, but someday, I am going to domesticate an adhi," Kiari determined.

"You had a varren back in the Milky Way, didn't you?" Vetra muttered.

“Shasta was cute, and no one can tell me otherwise."

She laughed to herself. "Why am I not surprised?"

"Am I becoming predictable? Peebee will be so disappointed," Kiari joked. She unholstered her assault rifle again and carried on with Vetra and Jaal close behind.

A few Roekarr battles later, the relative silence became tense and awkward. No one wanted to step on any toes.

"So...saw you coming out of Liam's quarters this morning," Vetra said.

"No."

"No?" One of Vetra's brow plates raised in question.

"We are not talking about this. Nothing even happened," Kiari growled.

"Alright, then."

A few paces later, Jaal spoke. "Is there the presumption that sexual activity has occured if you spend the night?"

"Yes. In my case, it has not. End of discussion, please," Kiari ordered.

"Is it taboo to discuss such things in your culture?"

"It depends on the person. Off-duty, I'd be happy to discuss it further for mutual cultural understanding, but that's just me. As it stands, we're in the middle of a mission. I prefer to stay professional," she clarified.

"You weren't so uptight when you were gushing over a killer dog-lizard…lizard-dog," Vetra joked.

Kiari's terse mission face broke into a light giggle. "Okay, fine. You have a point. I'm only that way so that I can keep focus. Otherwise, we might never get anything done."

"Ah. It makes sense. Carry on however you prefer, Ryder."

Kiari nodded to herself and reverted back into her resting face.

~~~~~~~

With the mission accomplished and the planet at nearly a hundred percent viability, the walk back was a lot more casual.

"So...seriously? Liam?" Vetra teased.

"I don't even know, okay? Feelings are confusing, and I don't want to deal with it right now."

"I'm curious. Why go for him and not someone else?”

“Who else would I-oooooh! Are you jealous?” Kiari teased.

“Answer the question, Ryder,” she chuckled.

"I already know that the two of you fight like alpha varren, so put that aside for a moment," Kiari sighed. She turned around and began to walk backwards. Occasionally, she swerved to miss a tree.

"But he's such an ass," Vetra protested.

"That's fair. But for me, it's more the endearing type of ass. As for why I was over there in the first place..." She looked down with a subdued expression. "I don't want it to seem like I don't appreciate my crew. I swear on my Avenger that I do. Everyone is wonderful. They're just so distant, and I'm used to having people to talk to when my brain decides to dive head-first into the dark shit."

"You okay?"

Kiari nodded to herself. "Yeah. Feeling all the pressure at once wasn't fun, so I went to talk. And if I stayed to cuddle, I don't see anything wrong with that."

"Is that not common?" Jaal asked.

"Generally, not really. I'm kind of uncommon," she replied with a small smirk.

"If anybody gives you any trouble, you come to me," Vetra ordered.

"It's really not that big of a deal. Some things happened. I'm dealing with them. Simple as that," Kiari replied.

"Funny how running away from a couple death clouds makes you respect a person. Seriously: I'm glad you're the Pathfinder."

Kiari glanced back up a Vetra. Her expression flashed back to neutral to avoid getting too happy. "Thanks. I mean that." She turned around again as they neared the science settlement. Just a little longer until the Tempest.

"And for what it's worth, I think the two of you would look good together," Vetra teased. Kiari fell back a little to check her with her shoulder.

"Yeah yeah. Just keep it quiet for now, okay?"

"Ah. Professional. You don't like to get attached," she sighed.

"Yeah. People have a tendency to, you know, die or go into a coma around me," Kiari joked with a bitter laugh.

"Neither of those were your fault."

"I wasn't...Just forget I said that. I need a shower. And a hot drink. In that order," she muttered as the Tempest opened before them. They waited out the decontamination in silence.

Kiari took off her helmet and the sealant beneath. She ran a hand through her hair and deposited her gear in her locker.

"SAM, set the course for Voeld," she ordered.

"Of course, Pathfinder."

"Oh! And Jaal? I'll be up in the comm room for that chat with Efvra in a bit. Give me about half an hour, give or take," Kiari said.

"Take however long you need," Jaal replied.

She nearly raced off to the Pathfinder quarters, but one leg collapsed under her. Kiari landed face-first on the floor of the cargo bay with an indignant yelp.

"Charlie horse! Owowowowow. God fucking damnit," she wheezed. Jaal tried to help her up. She waved him off. "I'm good. Overexertion from biotics. Need to stretch."

"Are you sure?"

Kiari sat down a bit more comfortably and rubbed at her calf until the twitching calmed down. "You guys go ahead and do whatever. My muscles will keep doing this for a while."

"Alright. But let us know if you need any help," Vetra said.

"Yeah yeah."

Liam poked his head out of his room once Jaal and Vetra headed off to hit the showers. He came up to her and knelt down.

"You doing okay?"

"Sore as fuck," Kiari groaned. “Ran out of ammo and had to take out some remnant with only tech and biotics. Not fun. Don’t recommend it.”

“Need some help?” he suggested.

“Are you a pro masseuse?”

“…No.”

“Then no.” Kiari rolled her eyes at him, but he could tell she was just tired.

“Wanna talk about what all went on down there?”

She shook her head as she worked the tension out of one thigh then the other. “Could use a banana or something.”

“Kiari?”

“Hm?” She didn’t look up from the spot where she was massaging.

“We don’t have bananas anymore.”

Kiari paused her ministrations. After considering the sentence for a moment, she sighed. “Sorry. I forget sometimes. Even with alien plants and animals and people everywhere, it still feels like home."

"Yeah. I woke up a while ago and completely forgot where I was," Liam said. "I ran one lap around the ship before I realized that I wasn't still in crisis response."

“Ha. Good daydream.” She stretched her arms above her head with a content moan from her throat. "Okay, I think I'm good. Help me up?"

"You got it." He took her hands and pulled her to her feet a little too hard. The momentum sent her barreling into his chest. Kiari pulled back a little. "Sorry!"

Kiari held his hand where it still laid on her shoulder. "Hey, it's fine. At least I'm up. Though I think I got a little Havarl...all over you," she muttered. Liam smiled at her. They disentangled a bit more.

"You coming up for poker night later?" he asked.

"I don't gamble, but I'd like to watch," Kiari promised.

"I'm gonna finally beat Gil tonight."

She pat his shoulder and started for the door. "That's what they all say."

"I'm gonna do it, Ki. It's happening," Liam yelled after her. Kiari turned to look at him with a curious expression.

"Ki?"

"Yeah. Do you not like nicknames?" he asked. He reached back to rub his neck awkwardly.

"As long as I get to call you Li," she challenged.

"No way."

"That settles it," Kiari teased.

"Fine, but only for you," he conceded.

She winked and headed off into the hallway towards her quarters. She didn't want to think too long on that last sentence. Did that make her special? Who was she kidding? Why would she be special?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> they didnt bang ok


End file.
